Music is my escape- my sanctuary. Any time the world throws something at me i just pick up my guitar - and pray.
3 years ago...
My first call as a Volunteer Firefighter was a M.V.A (Motor Vehicle Accident) involving a 19 year old college student. It was an apparent suicide. He had driven off the road and centered a tree. He didn't even hit his breaks. I was 18, and very green. I had no idea what to do, and was completely devastated at the site of that poor kid's lifeless body. Truthfully there wasn't anything i or anyone else could do. He was gone.
When i got back to the station that day i was fighting back tears, i didn't know what to do with myself. I had never witnessed a death much less the death of someone who was practically the same age as me, and the fact that everyone kept asking me if i was alright didn't help matters. Nevertheless being asked by a bunch of seasoned vet's, i told them "yes, i [was] fine"
Truth was, no i was not fine. This was bullshit. i felt like my soul had been ripped in half, I felt betrayed. How could there be a God in a world where someone so young, who had his whole life ahead of him, could die for no good reason at all. Honestly, i think this same question on every fatality call i have ever been on. Its something that plagues my mind and scares the hell out of me.
Feeling overwhelmed i sat down at the meeting table, picked up my guitar and played. I poured my soul into every note and every chord. Tears were streaming down my face as music rang out with every beat of my heart. It was at that moment my mind became clear, and i knew that He was listening. God is real, and although terrible things may happen that we cant explain. You have to know that God is there, and he does have a purpose for everything. I had lost God, but he found me in song - in prayer.
So just pray, he does hear you. No matter if you're Hindu, Muslim, Jew, Christian, Atheist, or Satanist... God hears you. I'm not saying i have all the answers, but i think He does, and i guess all i really wanted to get across in this blog is that all you have to do is open your heart to God and he will listen. No matter how you do it.
-Travis
